A goal....

I often ask myself what a goal is..... I have to think about it sometimes.  My goal is to ultimately be healthy.  I am on my way, and I am working really hard at this journey and I am not giving up.  I am on week 5 of this journey and I am happy to report that things are going really well.  I know the scale is just a number but sometimes that number matters.  This week the number I am reaching for is something under 300.  I am so close that I just want to hit that goal....I have been overweight most of my life with ups and downs and a that crazy cycle of yo-yo diets.  WW seems to be working for me and I plan to stick with it until the end and beyond that.  It is so important for me to be healthy.  The last few years I have been stuck in this crazy rut of not feeling good enough.  I know I am good enough, but when you hear that you are not so much it makes you start thinking that way.  I think my relationship with my best friend at the time is what really made me feel like I wasn't good enough.  11 years of friendship to just say "well I don't feel like we are on the same healthiness journey" is hurtful.  It hurt so bad that it made me go into this depression of feeling not good enough.  It made me feel like if I wasn't good enough for my best friend then who would I be good enough for.  I know I go back to this often because it was a moment for me.  It wasn't the reason I was overweight but it was the reason at that point in my life that I stopped caring about me, about who I was about my weight.  I still plan to tell this friend of mine in the future that what he said truly hurt me.  I don't plan on doing it now or anytime soon but one day it will happen.  I know now that I am good enough and I care enough about myself to do something for myself.  I also care enough about my son to be here for him and being here for him means reaching for my goals and meeting them.  My first goal is to reach 290....and then I will set another goal.  I am doing this for me and my son and no one else.  I realize now that I matter and that anything is possible.

 

Here is a picture of me in my new workout shirt from Ruffles with love.  Check out the shop here: http://www.etsy.com/shop/RufflesWithLove